So yesterday I shared a candid post referencing a local bar. I have been going there for a few years. Well before the new owners took over. I found out Tuesday that I am no longer welcome there.

Now what’s funny is that the bartenders held a vote and decided they didn’t want to serve me. From what I gather, their decision was based on my ex claiming I made statements about them…. The guy who went on vacation and never came back. He hates said bar and he also did some pretty dirty things to the employees, who supposedly were his best friends. According to the limited information I got, he told them that I said all kinds of shit about the bar and staff. No, rather, anything I heard came from him. But it’s not my business. And I still supported it.

Back up, HE told me he hated the place. He told me he was going to “tell the owner all about her bar” and what goes on there. Keep in mind he worked there prior, I didn’t. I have gone and supported this bar from the beginning and always, always taken good care of the staff. I don’t have anything but limited explanation as to my being turned away.

However I can put two and two together. Whatever he said or did is now being blamed on me. I can tell you that I mentioned the employees there twice to him and one of which was that his actions were affecting me. I told him I was barely looked at or served the last time I went. Again, he’d been pretty shady and I don’t condone his actions but I also can’t make a man do something.

Let’s be clear–if I have a beef with someone it isn’t hidden. I don’t go out of my way to start shit, certainly never have in that establishment, but I won’t be a fake either. I would have also unfriended a good 10-12 people if I had shit to say TO them or ABOUT them. Hell, rationality tells you if I didn’t want to see or support these people I wouldn’t go there or tip well. I knew the last time I went my ex had done at least one person wrong and that’s why I got the treatment I did. And this whole episode of me talking shit, is also guilt by association.

If this sounds like me playing the victim, I want to clear that up real quick. I have avoidance issues with emotions. I don’t like crying or hurting and I do have a tendency to drink too much when that happens. I am not blameless. If I had not used alcohol as a crutch, I wouldn’t be the kind of person that anyone would believe would say things like whatever it is they think I said. I wish I could sit here and say I have a couple and leave, but that’s a lie and every bartender there knows me. I enjoyed each and everyone of them, usually for at least a couple of hours, and felt I treated them well.

So I think what it comes down to is they believed a guy who screwed me over- admitted to me he wanted the place to suffer because HE didn’t like the people- when he said it came from me. I promise you this, I have a shit ton more issues with him than any of the staff.

Having said that, karma is real. I didn’t lie in my post about said establishment, but I don’t want to be an asshat despite what I think is going on. So if you saw that post, go to that bar. Support the female-owned venue and tip the bartenders well. That’s what I did for more than three years up til this week. I know for a fact they are hard-working people, some of whom have invited me into their homes. I don’t wish them unwell or else I wouldn’t have walked into the place to find out I am not welcome. I always referred to it as my Cheers.

I am incredibly hurt that they would believe lies but I am also aware that my behavior has apparently led to their believing what they hear. I’m sad, I miss my friends, I actually do love that place. I’m paying the price for someone else’s actions and my habit of making bad decisions, but they shouldn’t. They might not serve me, but I don’t want them to be affected by that. Again, these are people I called my friends and prayed for and respected. So please do go there and have a blasty blast.