I have been thinking, meditating and praying a lot about where I am in life right now. It’s very odd and new. It’s a new start and a lot of what I once knew and did and had is gone. I think I’m taking it well. I try to always remain grateful. For sure, life is better now than it was. But there’s new challenges (read: finances) and I haven’t gotten my new career down to a science just yet.  Those things have a way of letting doubt and fear creep inside me. Am I good enough? Am I smart enough? Do I got this?! Haha I don’t know but it I do know if I don’t pray and focus on the positive things, those thoughts steal the joy.

Sometimes it just feels like I’ve been racing and scrapping by so long that I’m drained. Other times, I sit in peace and joy and completely soak up the good that has come to me. And I suppose that’s how life goes: two things at odds with one another both real, true, and present in the same space. I did have some rough waters to navigate and the newfound joy comes with some it’s own set of tests. The thing I have to remind myself of is that I am prepared now for any test. Life tested me and I have passed. 

I am quitting smoking today. The only reason I bring this up here is to hold myself accountable. I sat paying bills today–and got a nice fat headache–and the one thing that will immediately reduce my expenses is that. In addition to the hundred other reasons, it’s time. It will not be easy. It isn’t meant to be. But like all other things, I can do it. 

I saw this quote and it made me pause and think a bit so in summary, I shall share it. The storm has changed me and I’m not the same person. I’m better.