I expressed emotion. Ok, not face-to-face but video. That counts right? It’s a step up anyway. It felt kinda good. I was a little queasy but finally I just said it. And now? It’s a relief. It’s not bottling up anywhere. I’m not gonna explode or hide and cry or just snap at people all day. Nothing really came of this small gesture—it wasn’t a proposal or a fight people, baby steps please—but now I felt like I’ve done my part. It’s like now you know where I stand. And you can do with that whatever, but you can’t say you didn’t know how I felt about it. Honestly, I thought saying how you felt would leave me raw, exposed. But it didn’t. Having tension and building things up and never saying anything, that’s tender and raw. Getting it out there and acting on things relieves that stress.

It’s not really that big of a deal, but it was out of character and I figure I need to share the small triumphs and not just complain or mope around this blog all the time!